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  Nudist Cruise

  By Hailey McPherson

  Copyright © 2013 Hailey McPherson

  All rights reserved. This book is protected under international copyright law and is licensed for personal use only. No part of this publication, including its cover artwork and illustrations, may be copied, reproduced in any format by any means, electronic or otherwise, without written consent from the copyright owner.

  Contents

  Introduction

  Chapter 1: The Pool Deck

  Chapter 2: Everybody’s Naked

  Chapter 3: Payong Flashing

  Chapter 4: Shanghai

  Chapter 5: Afternoon Delight

  Chapter 6: The Muster Drill

  Chapter 7: First Sea Day

  Chapter 8: Liam Can’t Get Naked

  Chapter 9: Checkers with Tina

  Chapter 10: Liam’s Big Show

  Chapter 11: Tasty Life

  Chapter 12: Xiamen

  Chapter 13: Dinner with Earl & Edna

  Chapter 14: Hong Kong

  Chapter 15: Naked Experiment

  Chapter 16: Hide & Seek

  Chapter 17: Girlapalooza

  Chapter 18: Second Sea Day

  Chapter 19: Mud People

  Chapter 20: Naked Matinee

  Chapter 21: Ho Chi Minh

  Chapter 22: Room for One More

  Chapter 23: Last Sea Day

  Chapter 24: Bangkok

  Chapter 25: Off to See the Buddha

  Chapter 26: Happy Endings

  Chapter 27: You Don’t Mess with the Dragons

  Chapter 28: Nudism 101

  About the Author

  Introduction

  My boyfriend worked on a cruise ship for about a week in June 2013, and I went along for the ride. Taking a cruise from Shanghai, China to Bangkok, Thailand is interesting enough, but what I did not know until just before I left for Shanghai was that this particular cruise ship was chartered by an international nudist organization. I unwittingly signed up to be on a cruise with about 2,000 nudists.

  Packing for trips to places I have never been is always trouble. I never know what to wear. On a nudist cruise, this was the least of my worries.

  I have never been comfortable being naked around other people. Fortunately, this was a clothing optional cruise. That meant everyone could stay as clothed as they wanted.

  I have also never been comfortable around naked people. Unfortunately, clothing optional means that if almost everyone on the ship is a nudist, they are going to get naked as much as possible.

  I knew nothing about nudists and their philosophy before the cruise. Most of the information I had was from other people who were just as ignorant and afraid of them as I was. What I learned about nudists and how they see the world around them surprised me and opened my eyes to a lifestyle that is nothing like what I feared.

  I made a few interesting friends on the cruise and saw a few fascinating places I had never been to before. I was also forced to confront my own prejudices and insecurities about people and places that are very different from what I have always known.

  After a trip to Bali at the end of February 2013, I wrote Hailey’s Bali Diary. People liked it more than I expected and some of them encouraged me to write about the cruise. I sat down expecting to write a blog post or maybe a short travelogue. Before I knew it, I had a full length book on my hands.

  Some names have been changed for privacy and I can’t guarantee that I remember everything everyone said word for word. Quotes might not be exactly what everybody said, but they should convey the general idea.

  Chapter 1: The Pool Deck

  I walked out to the pool deck with my towel wrapped tightly around my body like I just got out of the shower, except that I was completely dry. I was also wearing a bikini under the towel. Even with the bikini, towel, sandals on my feet and hat on my head, I still felt naked and exposed.

  When the elevator doors to the pool deck opened, the first thing I noticed was the bright sunlight. It was a beautiful day and the pool area opened itself to the sun and sky as much as the cabin decks were dark and closed off.

  The second thing I noticed was about a hundred naked people in and around the pool. It was like a sea of naked bodies on the deck of this giant boat. Many of them were wearing sandals and some of them had hats. A few of the women had sarongs wrapped around their waists. Other than those few bits of clothing here and there, these people were all completely naked.

  Walking out of the elevator, I could see somewhere around fifty pairs of breasts in every size and shape imaginable bouncing up and down in the sun. There were also more penises than I have ever seen in my life. Not that I’ve seen that many, but this was like a sausage factory exploded. They were everywhere. These were the most naked people I had ever seen and none of them seemed at all self-conscious that they were all naked as the day they were born. I suddenly felt overwhelmingly overdressed.

  “Protect your eyes,” Liam would have said if he was there. “Don’t look at all the dicks.”

  “But you’re looking at all the breasts,” I would have told him.

  “That’s different,” he would say.

  “How?” I would ask.

  “There are twice as many, so they’re twice as hard to avoid.”

  The closer I got to the swimming pool, the more I expected everyone to turn to look at me and announce in unison that I had to get naked. No one ever did, of course. People smiled and said hello. Some of the people in the pool suggested I jump in.

  “Come on in.” A small group of mostly women saw that I was alone and invited me to join them. “The water’s great.”

  “Plenty of room here, sweetie.” I can’t remember if she actually said “sweetie”, but it was that kind of friendly tone.

  When I opened my towel and set it down on one of the pool chairs, it was obvious that I was not naked, but no one mentioned it.

  I wanted to join them and be friendly. I think I am a naturally friendly person. I’m from Minnesota. We are just born friendly. But in a crowd of nudists, I knew I was not one of them. It was like wearing a Helga Hat at a Packers game.

  I picked a pool chair that was set off from most of the other people, but not off in some distant corner somewhere. I sat on my towel and watched all the naked people having fun. I briefly thought about taking off my bikini. I could see myself standing up as if I was center stage with everyone else in the audience watching me as I stripped completely naked. I could picture myself diving naked into the pool and soaking naked in one of the hot tubs. In my mind, we all sat naked in the hot tub with cocktails in our hands, discussing art and the events of the day.

  I wanted to be part of the group and enjoy myself as much as they were obviously enjoying themselves. There were just too many people around. I could not bring myself to do it. I wanted to. I knew this was the perfect time and place. I knew that if I was ever going to be naked in public, a cruise ship full of nudists was the way to go.

  I also knew that this was not how I was raised. I could hear in my head my entire family telling me what a terrible person I was just for being around these people. I wanted to fully enjoy the moment, but I just could not get past my own hang ups.

  There was no nudity in my house when I was a child. I could not even go out of the house until my clothes were inspected. Not to make sure they were not dirty or didn’t have any holes, but to make sure I did not “look like a whore”. As an adult, I think it is strange to tell a small child not to look like a whore.

  I never knew such a thing as a nude cruise even existed a few weeks earlier. When I found out about this cruise, my boyfriend Liam did not even bother to tell me that it would be full of nudists. He sold me on the idea of going on a cruise for practically f
ree and only later bothered to mention that everyone else would be naked.

  One of Liam’s friends works in one of the house bands on the ship. Both Liam and Sebastian play guitar and bass. Sebastian also plays piano, but he did not think it would be a problem that Liam does not. So when Sebastian wanted to take time off work to go to his father’s funeral, he recruited Liam to cover for him.

  Liam and I thought about working on a cruise ship when we still lived in Minnesota. Cruise ships are always looking for entertainers. Since Liam is a musician and I’m a singer and dancer, it would not be too hard for both of us to find work on the same ship. We can work together without competing for the same jobs.

  We didn’t really like what we found out when we looked into it, though. When you work on a cruise ship you are stuck on the ship for months at a time. Most cruises only last seven to ten days for the passengers, but the ship and the people who work on them have to keep going. It might be a great job if you love it, but if you immediately hate it, you are still stuck on the ship until they reach a port where you can get off and go home.

  We ended up getting jobs in Hong Kong instead. We did not know anything about Hong Kong, but at least we knew we could always get on a plane and leave if we really wanted to. Eventually, Liam did. Tired of Hong Kong, he took a job in Mainland China and we have been living apart ever since.

  When Sebastian asked Liam if he wanted to cover for him, Liam jumped at the chance. It would only be temporary since Sebastian would go back to the ship after he was finished doing all the things he had to do for his father’s funeral. Liam is in a house band at a club in China and he does not like it there very much. There are a lot of things he does not like about living in China, and playing with the same band in the same club every night just bores him to death. He was excited at the thought of playing with a different band, let alone playing on a cruise ship.

  The problem was that they only needed Liam as a replacement and not me. Liam wanted me to go.

  “Do you want to come with me?” he asked.

  “Yes,” I screamed. “Go on a cruise? Are you kidding? Yes, of course.”

  We moved to Hong Kong together, but we have been living apart since he took the job in China. Any chance we have to see each other and we jump on it.

  Liam would be paid to go, but I would have to pay if I wanted to join him since I would not be working. Cruises are very expensive. Some of the shorter cruises on smaller boats are not too bad, but this was one of those massive cruise ships. If I wanted to be there all the time Liam was there, I would have to take a full ten day cruise. That is not cheap.

  We just took a vacation to Bali three months before the cruise. That was a pretty expensive trip and we are not made of money. People usually save up for years to go on a cruise.

  “Sebastian really wants me to take it,” Liam told me.

  “So do I,” I replied.

  “I really want you to go with me,” he added.

  “So do I,” I replied.

  We simply could not afford it. Liam decided he did not want to go if I could not go with him, and he told Sebastian to start looking for someone else. But there was just not enough time. Maybe if Sebastian knew further ahead that he would need time off he could have gotten another replacement, but he did not know that his father was going to die.

  This is another bad thing about working on a cruise ship. Things pop up.

  “Shit happens,” as Liam says.

  When you are working on a cruise ship, it can be difficult to take time off without any advance warning.

  For about two days, Sebastian would call Liam from the ship, Liam would call me from China, I would call Liam from Hong Kong and Liam would call Sebastian.

  “Sebastian says he’ll pay for your ticket,” Liam announced after one of their many phone calls back and forth.

  “Really?” I asked. “He’s that desperate?”

  “I guess I’m the only one who can go right away.”

  “Maybe you should just go without me,” I said. “If he’s that desperate, you should just help him out. I don’t have to go.”

  “But I want you to go.” Liam said.

  “I know that,” I replied.

  “And you want to go.” Liam added.

  “I really know that,” I replied. “But we can’t make him pay for my ticket. That’s thousands of dollars. We’d be taking advantage of someone whose father just died.”

  Liam saw that I was right and accepted the fact that he would have to go without me. Before he could tell Sebastian, Sebastian called him and said that since he works for the cruise line, he gets a big discount. Paying for my ticket would not cost him all that much. It was as if he heard our conversation.

  “I’d still feel guilty,” I told Liam. “Like I was taking advantage of him.”

  “If it makes you feel any better,” Liam said, “You’ll have to buy your own plane ticket to Shanghai.”

  “Shanghai?” I asked. That is when it really occurred to me that I did not know where this cruise was going.

  “Sebastian says the easiest way is for you to board in Shanghai where the cruise starts and we’ll both get off in Bangkok, where it ends,” Liam informed me. “I’ll go earlier since that’s when Sebastian’s leaving, but it’s a different cruise.”

  “Where would you get on the ship?” I asked.

  “In Hong Kong,” Liam answered.

  “That’s convenient,” I thought. “But then why can’t I get on in Hong Kong? Why do I have to fly to Shanghai?”

  “Because they’re two different cruises,” Liam said. “When the ship goes to Shanghai, it’s one cruise. Then everyone gets off and it’s another cruise from Shanghai.”

  “It would be a lot easier if I could get on in Hong Kong,” I said.

  “Yes, but the Hong Kong stop is in the middle of the cruise,” Liam replied. “I’m only getting on there because that’s where Sebastian’s getting off. Since you’re a paying passenger, you have to get on and off at the same time as all the other passengers.”

  I understood what Liam was saying, but I wanted to go with him on the ship in Hong Kong. For one thing, I live in Hong Kong. I would not need to take a plane to get on the ship. In fact, I can walk from my apartment to where the ship docks in about thirty minutes. For another, I wanted to spend as much time with Liam as possible, especially since we had not seen each other in person since our Bali trip.

  That is when he told me that the cruise went from Shanghai to Xiamen, Hong Kong, Ho Chi Minh and ended in Bangkok. It was a seven day cruise, but Liam would be on the ship for ten days since he was filling in for Sebastian. We would both need plane tickets back from Bangkok.

  This was not an ideal situation, and these were not my favorite places to go on a cruise, but a free cruise is always a good deal. We only had to buy plane tickets, and flights to Shanghai and Bangkok are not that expensive from Hong Kong. What I liked most about it was spending time with Liam, and being on a cruise. It never really mattered that I never really cared about the cities where the ship was going to stop. Bangkok was on our short list of places to go when we took our Bali vacation, but I have never really thought about the other places.

  When I looked up information about the ship, I did not care anymore where it was going. This was the most beautiful ship I had ever seen. Granted, I don’t know much about cruises, but this ship had pretty much everything you could ever hope for in a cruise ship. It was not going to the Bahamas or some other tropical paradise, but when you are on this ship, who cares? It is like a floating resort hotel. You don’t even have to ever leave the ship if you don’t want to. I knew this ship would be better than any hotel we would ever stay at if we ever went to Bangkok or any of these other places on our own.

  “Sebastian just called,” Liam announced. “The cruise is pretty much full. People book these things months in advance.”

  “So I can’t go?” I asked. I was already looking forward to it.

  “You can go,” Liam sai
d. He acted like he was giving me bad news. “But there aren’t any of the cheapest rooms available, so Sebastian had to upgrade us to a suite with a balcony.”

  “Are you kidding?” I asked in disbelief.

  When I looked up information about the ship, I saw all the different types of rooms. I thought we would get what they call an “inside stateroom”. Those are the smallest rooms and they do not have any windows because they are deeper inside the ship. The rooms with balconies are bigger and obviously they face outside since they have balconies. The suites are like luxury hotel rooms.

  “How much is that going to cost?” I asked.

  “Nothing,” Liam said. “It’s just a little extra. Sebastian says it’s no problem. He can handle it.”

  I knew this was a lie, or at least a serious exaggeration. Those suites have to cost at least twice as much as the tiny inside rooms. I wanted to go enough that I told myself not to worry about it. We were taking advantage of a guy whose father just died. At the same time, we were really helping him out. If Liam could not fill in, Sebastian could not go to his father’s funeral. I was going to go on a cruise to help someone grieve for his family. That is how I rationalized it, at least.

  The next step as far as I was concerned was getting visas. We both already had Chinese visas, so Shanghai and Xiamen would not be a problem, and we don’t need visas to go to Bangkok. Ho Chi Minh was the troublemaker. Americans need visas to go to Vietnam.

  Most people book cruises months in advance, so they have plenty of time to get whatever visas they need. We had about a week. That is not nearly enough time to go to an embassy, fill out a bunch of forms, give them a lot of money and your passport and wait for them to give it back. We could still go on the cruise without a visa to Vietnam, but we would not be able to get off the ship at the Ho Chi Minh stop.

  I wasn’t sure if I cared or not. There was more than enough to do on this ship and I have never really thought about going to Vietnam anyway. At the same time, if I’m in a place, I feel like I might as well look around and see what it’s all about. It would be a shame to go to Vietnam and not even step off the boat.